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Jokes . . .

Clever jokes

1) (hip hip array!)
2) Two bytes meet. The first byte asks, “Are you ill?”
The second byte replies, “No, just feeling a bit off.”
3) A SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, “Can I join you?”

Yo’ mama’s so…

4) If your mom was a collection class, her insert method would be public.
5) Your mommas so fat that not even Dijkstra is able to find a shortest path around her.

Questions and answers

6) Q: What is the difference between a programmer and a non-programmer ?
A: The non-programmer thinks a kilobyte is 1000 bytes while a programmer is convinced that a kilometer is 1024 meters
7) Q: How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: none, that’s a hardware problem.
8) Need to grab someone else’s private property
Q: “What’s the object-oriented way to become wealthy?”
A: Inheritance
9) Q: Why are Assembly programmers always soaking wet?
A: Because they work below C-level.
10) Q: How many prolog programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Yes.
11) Q: Why do java programmers have to wear glasses?
A: Because they don’t see sharp
12) Q: What did the Java code say to the C code?
A: You’ve got no class.
13) Q: How did the programmer die in the shower?
A: He read the shampoo bottle instructions: Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

Kinda pervert…

14) Software is like sex: It’s better when it’s free.
15) Why programmers like UNIX:
unzip, strip, touch, finger, grep, mount, fsck, more, yes, fsck, fsck, fsck, umount, sleep
16) What’s the difference between Software Development and Sex? In sex, you don’t get a bonus for releasing early.
15) Documentation is like sex. When it’s good, it’s very good. When it’s bad, it’s better than nothing.

Have some, comment them. **Shared Jokes.


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The Hyper Text Transfer Protocol (HTTP) was initiated at the CERN in Geneve (Switzerland), where it emerged (together with the HTML presentation language) from the need to exchange scientific information on a computer network in a simple manner. The first public HTTP implementation only allowed for plain text information, and almost instantaneously became a replacement of the GOPHER service. One of the first text-based browsers was LYNX which still exists today; a graphical HTTP client appeared very quickly with the name NCSA Mosaic. Mosaic was a popular browser back in 1994. Soon the need for a more rich multimedia experience was born, and the markup language provided support for a growing multitude of media types.

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Word of the Day

Here is your word for today:

Verse:   2 Chronicles 16:9

'The eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to show Himself strong in the behalf of them whose heart is perfect toward Him.'

- The Lord wants to step into your situation and show His strength.
- The Lord wants to show Himself strong on your behalf.
- Our hearts are perfect towards Him when we have placed all our hope in Him.
- No situation escapes His view, so let's be confident in His strength and ability.

PRAYER: Lord, I pray that You will come and show Yourself strong on my behalf. Move in my situation and may I see the powerful and mighty hand of God at work. Amen.

Have a blessed Tuesday.